5 Basic Tips for Effective Body Language

After, looking at body language one by one I want to give five basic tips for controlling our body language. By doing these, you will manage to impress people much easier.

•    Use eye contact to show appreciation.

If you have problem with eye contact, you can even try to look at the person’s nose.

•                   Smile and laugh to stimulate good feelings.

It both makes you feel comfortable and makes people think that you are trustworthy and approachable.

  

•   Mirror postures to show agreement.                                                    

        Stimulating people make other people feel understood.

• Shake hands firmly

        This shows both your self confidence and makes people trust you easily.

• Stand up straight with your shoulders back

        Be balanced from toes to the head. It shows your confidence best. 

Face

It is time to see other facial body languages: the nose, cheeks and chin.

Color of the face can indicate something.

Red face shows embarrassment or anger whilst white face indicates extreme fear.

Nose:

Rubbing the nose can be a sign of disagreement.

Flared nostrils indicate displeasure or internal judgment.

Sniffing can show disgust or displeasure unless it is because of cold.

Touching nose: If the person tells a lie, he touches his nose. Because, while telling lie blood vessels in the nose dilate and the nose swells and be red. As a result the person tries to itch it.

Chin:

If a person holds his chin, he feels threatened. It is a defensive move.

It also shows that the person is thinking hard.

Cheeks:

Pulling cheeks shows disapproval.

Blowing cheeks out indicates uncertainty. It can also show exhaustion.

Touching cheeks may sign horror or surprise.

After these body language indicators, I will give a chart where you can find all signals of our emotions

Anxiety	Eyes damp; eyebrows slightly pushed together; trembling lower lip; chin possibly wrinkled; head slightly tilted down.
Anger	Eyes wide and staring; eyebrows pulled down (especially in middle); wrinkled forehead; flared nostrils; mouth flattened or clenched teeth bared; jutting chin, red face.
Happiness	Mouth smiling (open or closed); possible laughter; crows-feet wrinkles at sides of sparkling eyes; slightly raised eyebrows; head level.
Sadness	Eyes cast down and possibly damp or tearful; head down; lips pinched; head down or to the side.
Envy	Eyes staring; mouth corners turned down; nose turned in sneer; chin jutting.
Interest	Steady gaze of eyes at item of interest (may be squinting); slightly raised eyebrows; lips slightly pressed together; head erect or pushed forward.
Boredom	Eyes looking away; face generally immobile; corners of mouth turned down or lips pulled to the side; head propped up with hand.

Posture

Our posture is the first thing that people notice when you encounter with them. It clearly shows whether you have confidence or anger etc. Through posture you can also give the message whether or not you want people to approach you.

Your posture conveys your level of self confidence.

Erect Bearing: It is the posture of pride. This straight position indicates that you are confident

Nonetheless, if you don’t stand erect it gives the message that you don’t trust yourself or you feel ashamed of something.

Standing is not the only point of posture body language. Even your lying, sitting or walking style can give some messages to the other people.

Approach: while talking to someone, you don’t want to be interrupted if you form a rectangle.

they don't want to be interrupted

If their feet point outward, it is an inviting position.

The torsos of the men are toward to the woman and their feet make a triangle. So, it is an inviting position for the woman.

Arms and Shoulders

Arms

You can understand when somebody tries to control his body language while looking at his arms. This person possibly holds one arm to keep both of them.

Expanding: If you keep your arm away from you it shows confidence. It indicates comfort and trust.

However, when your arm is closed or crossed, this is a protective or uninviting position. The person might intend to defense himself or to hide himself for not being noticed. Meanwhile, pay attention to his thumbs. Since, crossed arms with thumbs up indicate approval or agreement. Otherwise, crossed arms mean disagreement.

In a nutshell crossed arms show anxiety but this can’t be generalized for every situation. It can even be a relaxed position.

When you touch someone’s arm, this indicates invitation, trust or sympathy. If you want to persuade someone or make the person trust you, you can touch his arm.

If the person is excited or confident, he waves his arms a lot. But, in a less confident situation his arms get smaller and closer to the body.

Shoulders

Although shoulders don’t have much movement, they can indicate many a signal.

Raising shoulders give the message that the person feels anxiety or fear. If this occurs with a lowering head, this indicates the fear more obviously.

Pushing shoulders back shows a bigger torso. So, it can demonstrate dominancy.

Shrugging shoulders means “I don’t know”

Turning shoulders while talking to someone shows uncomfortable situation. If someone does it while looking at you, he possibly wants to leave.

Legs and Feet

Legs body language can give lots of messages without us really realizing. Their situation is really interesting because when someone tries to control his body language, he controls upper body. Legs give us people’s real intention.

Crossing legs over the knee or at the ankle shows anxiety. Moreover, crossed legs can give a negative or protective message. Possibly, the person is trying to isolate himself from the environment. While sitting, this can also show a relaxed situation.

     

If this is seen while standing, this shows the person’s shyness or instability.

Nevertheless, uncrossed or open legs indicate that the person is open to communication.  This is an inviting body language.

Standing about the width of the shoulders is a relaxed position. However, legs’ being wider shows dominancy or power.

The direction of our feet shows where our mind wants to be. If their position is to the person we talk it shows that the person could catch our attention. Furthermore, if you try to influence someone you can point your feet towards that person consciously. However, feet’s position to the door indicates boredom or impatience. When we want to go away from somewhere, our feet are directed to the door. 

While pointing feet show interest, pulling feet show disinterest.

Moreover, jiggling or tapping can show boredom. They can even indicate irritation.

Stamping feet can sign anger. It can even be an attempt to get attention.

When you want to understand whether or not someone is telling lie, you can look at his feet. In this situation people can move their feet. It occurs especially when the feet are hidden like under a table. Moving feet can also show anger or anxiety.

If a crossed leg moves front and back it shows impatience.

Mouth and Lips "talking without words"

Mouth

Our eating and breathing organ is also important for conveying our body language. By looking at people’s mouth we can conclude something about people unless they occur because of some physical reasons.

Smiling: When we first encounter with someone me, we make a decision about him in a few seconds. So, to impress people what we should do firstly is to smile. Smiling is also the most recognized signal. If you smile, you feel comfortable and relaxed.

Smiling someone shows the desire for communication. If this is a genuine smile, it is a friendly attitude and indicates honesty.

You can distinguish genuine smile from the forced smile by looking at his eyes. If it is a forced smile, only their lips change. Upper face stands same and teeth are rarely seen. Forced smile shows that the person is not telling the truth if it is not for politeness.

Speaking: If the mouth moves a little with incoherent mumbling, it shows that the person doesn’t want to speak. When it moves a lot, it indicates dominance or excitement.

Covering: If the person covers his mouth without any reason, he might be trying to conceal the truth or betray emotions.

        

          Yawning: It can indicate boredom.

  

Sucking or biting: When the person feels uncomfortable or tells a lie, he might suck or bite something. It can be finger or a pen. If the person feels more anxious, he doesn’t suck but bite.

Lips

For showing our emotions, our lips are the best supporter. They talk without words.

Puckered or pursed lips show dislike or disapproval. Pursed lips are generally the signal of anger. Flattened lips can also show frustration or anger.

Biting lips: show anxiety or anger. The person might feel nervous about something.

If the bottom lip is over the top lip, it shows uncertainity.

If the top lip is over the bottom lip, it can indicate guilty.

If the finger touches the lip, it shows internal thinking.

If someone looks at your lips deliberately, he might be trying to understand you.

Hands “often louder than words”

Hands are most obvious body language indicators. They can be extremely expressive to show our feelings. So, whether or not people are talking we can understand their thoughts or feelings with the help of their hands.

I will give some basic tips about the signals that our hands give to other people. However, you shouldn’t forget that some gestures have different meanings for different cultures. While trying to give a positive message, you might be misunderstood by the people due to the cultural differences.

Greeting: We often use our hands for greeting. Mostly we shake hands. However, different shaking hands give different messages.

 For instance, if the person holds his hand on top, it is a signal of dominance. On the other hand, to indicate submission the person shakes hands with palm up and a floppy hand. Lastly, the person can shake hands with vertical palms. 

This shows equality.

Touching: If the person touches himself, it is related to self-affirmation or anxiety. When he touches a different person, this indicates domination or friendship.  While touching on your shoulder shows dominance, gently touching on your arm shows friendship. Moreover, the style of touching a person gives different messages.  Using full palm of the hand is warm whilst using just fingertips is less affectionate.

Hiding: We can also use our hands to hide something. If a person doesn’t want to look, he puts his hands to his eyes. Furthermore, if he wants to say something but feels uncomfortable, he puts his hands to his mouth.

If the person tries to hide his hands, it indicates that the person doesn’t want to communicate or collaborate.  It can also show the desire of listening, not talking.

Clenched fist is a signal of anger or solidarity.

                                          

           Thumbs up shows approval while thumbs down shows disapproval.

 Palms up is seen friendly and open while palms down is seen dominant and aggressive. 

Holding something with Cupped Hands may indicate delicacy.

On the other hand, holding it with Gripping Hands can be a signal of possessiveness or desire.

Comfortable or not? When the person feels comfortable, you can understand it by looking his fingers. Possibly, there is much space between his fingers or his thumbs rise more often when he speaks. Steepling is another, possibly the most important, tip showing confidence.

On the other hand, when the person feels stressful, he probably rubs his hands.